Wasting time

Now is strange travel city by city after having been for several days in the nature. I would to say that a park is just a lot of trees and paths, similar each other every day. I would like to find cities and activities more interesting and varied. But now, see a new city every day seems to me that I’m jus wasting my time, instead in the park I was feeling that no time, no hour was wasted, no tree, no path, no step.

I feel something that tells me to come back, take the bus in the other direction, walking around the nature during the day and sleep under the stars at night.

That days gave to me a lot. Unbelieving conversations, and thoughts. How can I live without that deep feelings in my chest, and mind? I can remember, and reproduce them, but are not the truth, the truth that I was just starting to know.

In some sense, I hate and escape the remember of some feeling, because it hurts too much the comparison, without them.

But how to deny the beauty and purity of certain thoughts?

What cowardly person would I be, if rather be blind just because the light is too much glaring?

For some magnificent moments, I keep hearing these words in my head, in any eventuality:

“You will not incur in anything wrong, anything bad. Because I’m with you”. And now it seems to me, to be back left to myself.

I know, should be in my mind wherever I stay. But the fear, that I never felt there, not for animals, not for rain, not for people, suddenly is here. I almost forgotten it. So strange forgotten to be sad, or afraid, but I did.